Losing sight of the shore

What seems likes ages ago, I walked in the house on a Friday evening after a long week of teaching to find Aaron, my husband, sitting at the kitchen table with his laptop and a menacing grin on his face. I immediately  sensed that something was up, which he had completely masked during our phone conversation on my  drive home. When he asked me to sit down, I quickly said "where are we moving?" Aaron and I had had several conversations about moving internationally when past opportunities arose, and we had previously decided, if the location was right and we didn't have kids yet, we would go for it. I knew by his anxious and abnormal appearance, he had news. With a huge smile on his face he said "Shanghai". I honestly don't remember the first words out of my mouth, but if I had to guess I'd say it was probably along the lines of "SHUT UP!!!!" (In the excited kind of way)! After several minutes of shock, excitement, and general freaking out, I realized there wasn't one doubt in my mind that my answer was yes. How could we possibly pass up such a unique, thrilling, life-changing opportunity? We quickly googled "Shanghai" and began gawking at the flood of maps, images, and facts we found. 

And that was how it all it all started. At that point it was just a possibility, so Aaron challenged me with the quest of not telling anyone until it became more official. Ha. I can keep anyone's secret but my own. Gradually over the next couple months, we "accidentally " told our closest friends (usually with the help of a few cocktails to loosen our lips!) At this point though, I felt  like I was lying as I shared the news, because it just hadn't become reality yet. Gradually, over the past few months it has become more official as we have gotten more details, made contacts in our future  home, started learning the language, and set dates. Aaron had his first trip over for 2 weeks in April, and that really sealed the deal. He loved Shanghai and convinced me I would too. Keeping the news from my colleagues at work was the hardest part, but finally, on April 30th, the news was out and it finally sank in... We are moving to Shanghai!!

To say my emotions have been a roller coaster is an understatement. The majority of the time I have felt like my hands are in the air and I'm soaring down hill screaming in complete elation. I feel utterly blessed to have this amazing opportunity and know that God specifically carved this journey in our paths long ago. I can't explain the sense of confidence and faith that I have had that this is 100% what God is calling us to do. I just know in my heart that there is something more there for us than a job and I can't wait to find out what it is. On the other hand, I have experienced the slow, fear-inducing chug up that first big hill, when all you can think about is the loops and turns that lurk ahead. I am a people person to say the least, and to be honest, my biggest fear is being lonely. The hardest part is, we LOVE our life now. We love Nashville, we love our friends, we love being close to our families, we love our jobs. I have said repeatedly, "It would be so much easier to leave if we we unhappy, or missing something... unfulfilled." But whoever said change was easy? I recently found a quote that I keep reminding myself of... "You can't discover new oceans if you don't have the courage to lose sight of the shore." 

So here we go.... The shore is at my back, and I'm ready to dive into the ocean ahead. After these months of exciting, agonizing, and inpatient anticipation, my first encounter with the infamous Shanghai is around the corner. I am aboard the flight as I  write this and with 7 hours still to go, my anxious and wandering mind hasn't let me  sleep a wink.  It is hard for me to believe that it has been 6 months since this journey became a possibility. Aaron came back to China last week for work, but I decided to stay back to take advantage of every last minute I could spend with friends in Cincinnati and Louisville. So, nervously, I agreed to fly solo and meet Aaron in Shanghai today...which in Shanghai is actually tomorrow! This is just an orientation short trip to find an apartment, then we will be back home for about 3 weeks to pack up before the final departure  (with our sweet pooch, Stella, of course)! 

I was one of the first to board the plane in Chicago and as I situated my books, earphones, iPad, and snacks around me it hit me that I would be sitting next to someone for 14 hours that was also going to Shanghai. Would they be American? Chinese? My age? Soon, a beautiful teenage Chinese girl and her very trendy looking mother approached. Haven been assigned to the dreaded middle seat, when they asked if I minded taking the window so they could sit beside each other I happily obliged (and was relieved that they spoke decent English!) We instantly started chatting  and sharing the reasons for our trips. I learned that Change Liu and her mom, Hua, have lived in Jacksonville for a year and are coming back to China for the summer to visit family. When I told them about our upcoming move, they excitedly shared that they will be in Shanghai in mid-July and would love to show me around and the best places to shop! I looked around at all of the gray-haired men and sleeping travelers with earphones on, and thanked God for seating me in 41B. He is so good. Over the past couple hours Change Liu and Hua have helped me learn some new Chinese words, shared their Ferraro Roche chocolates with me, and most importantly have figuratively wrapped their arms around me and said, "It's going to be alright." It's amazing what an impact such a seemingly minute experience can make. 

So my nerves are calm, my legs are cramped, and I can't wait for the next 4 hours and 14 minutes to pass so I can meet Shanghai... and if this flight has been any kind of foreshadowing, all of the lovely people there. 

To be continued...